fartgallery:

4/20? You mean 1/5 reduce your fractions did you even learn math

(via jestermd)

esteljune:

Playing video games while someone else’s watching

image

(via littlestarlolo)

summcohen:

tv meme | 03 favourite musical moments → let’s go to the mall (how i met your mother). (03/03)

(via shewhohangsoutincemeteries)

In every school, all over the world, in every class, there was always that person that was better than everyone else. You can hold on to the fact that, yeah they were Mr. Perfect in school, and everyone resented them, and they were so great, but in later life Mr. Perfect will have  made his mistakes. he will have screwed things up.
And now, with facebook, you can find the bastards.

(via eyesinajar)

juliabe:

Miranda (via Juliabe)

juliabe:

Miranda (via Juliabe)

dances-withhipsters:

resubee:

Thor the passive aggressive roommate.

IF THOU CANNOT FLUSH AFTER USING THE TOILET, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO USE IT AT ALL.

(via the-cardboard-cutout)

ethiopienne:

american politics

(via tvjunky4ever)

You know, funny story: There’s this craft store called Michaels. Look, my sister knits, and she goes to Michaels. So my sister called me and she’s like, “Oh my god, I’m at Michaels, picking up yarn. You have a poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “What?” She’s like, “There’s a poster, there’s a Falcon poster at Michaels.” I’m like, “Holy s**t!” She’s like, “I’m gonna come and pick you up, and we’re gonna see your poster in this store.” So she picks me up and we go to Michaels.

We go in, and I see the poster and I’m like, “Oh, this is….” She’s like, “I know, I know.” I said, “I’m gonna sign these posters.” I was like, “That would be amazing, you buy a poster and it’s like, actually signed by the Falcon.” Like, it would blow my mind. So I go to the front, I buy a Sharpie, I run back to the back of the store. And she’s like, “I’m gonna take a picture of you signing it.”

I’m in this store and I’m signing all the posters. The manager comes out, he’s like, “Hey, whatcha doing?” I was like, “Oh man, I’m signing these posters so when people buy ‘em, they’re signed.” He’s like, “Well, people are not gonna buy ‘em if they’re signed.” And I was like, “No, no, no, it’s cool. I’m pretty sure there won’t be a problem.” And he goes, “Yeah, but it is gonna be a problem, you’re messin’ up my inventory.” And I’m like, “No, my man, trust me. I mean, I’m the Falcon, that’s me!” And he goes, “Yeah, right. You’re gonna buy those posters.” I said, “What?” He’s like, “You’re gonna buy all those posters or I’m gonna call the police.”

He rolls up all the posters and goes to the front of the store. And I had to buy like 60 Falcon posters that I signed in Michaels.

— Anthony Mackie getting in trouble for signing his posters at a Micheals  (x)

(via gustavskarsgard)

batreaux:

You bump into a man on the subway wearing a trenchcoat. You apologize and he responds “Its alright. We’re only human. All of us. All of us here are human. Yep. Very human. I’m probably the most human here! You betcha.” and then the trenchcoat falls and the figure collapses and roughly 1000 salamanders scatter around the train 

(via jazzpancakes)